Indy Telecom & Industrial Media

A certain muggle has asked that I divulge to the world my middle name. But little does the muggle know how big a challenge this is.

Why, you ask? Because to know the name of a Ninja, is to know him for who he is. And if you knew who he is, then he is no longer a Ninja because, well, you know who he is.

Stealth is a Ninja’s only true friend. And if a Ninja loses his stealth, he becomes very vulnerable. To little kittens who may nibble on him. To the vagaries of the stock exchange (speaking of which, is it me or does anyone else think that Fox Business News is run by Ninjas?). To private equity monsters.

To this man. Or this woman.

My middle name, my friends, is Michraphangelatellardo. Lardo for short.

L is for the L that’s not in Ninja. Or my name.

A is for Yet Another Ninja. Or me.

R is for, well, Rhinoceros (variety and all that). Or Raptors, who are outside your house right now.

D is for Deadly Ninja. Or me.

and O is for “O! It’s a Ninja!” Turn around!

And now, you all have made me vulnerable to the most dangerous things known to man.

For a Ninja, one is many and many is one (which would explain Rajnikanth, who is secretly a Ninja). And one nut is the same as many nuts. So, Mr. Almonds, I nominate you.